Royalty

There has been a lo of talk lately about the royal prince being born. Congrats to the family, however I wonder why this world has their priorities so off. Let me explain.

Last night a 12 year old boy could have been viewing porn for the first time. A 9 year old girl was getting molested by her owner because she was sold. A 15 year old boy watched his father beat his mother. There a children being born everyday that don't get the attention that this one child gets.

Every child, from every culture, deserves to know love. Deserves to feel protected. Deserves to be feel like a princess or a prince. Jut because they aren't born into a royal family on earth, they are born into a royal family in heaven. 

So, with that being said, every child deserves the same amount of attention that the royal baby has been getting since he was born. Because every child Is just as important to God as he is to the rest of the world.

Hindrances

This morning I was listening to Joyce Meyers and she has so many good things she said. 

She was talking about Hindrances in our walk with God. Jesus didn't die so we could have our own religion but so that we can have a personal relationship with God, the Holy Spirit and others. We spend to much time trying to use Gods word to our benefit and not see it for what it really stands for. The more time we spend with God and in His word the more the devil becomes afraid of us. Just being there on Sunday and a few prayers during the week don't cut it. 

Distractions get in our way of our relationship with God. The hard reality is that we are responsible for the time we are given, so we are our biggest hindrance! Work can get in the way. We can't be like Martha who chose to work while Jesus was visiting. Joyce made a huge point! Go by a junk yard and see the decay in the metal pile. Someone at one time worked and worked and worked for that item and thy couldn't take it with them. Everything we have is already starting to decay! 

We have to constantly be evaluating our priorities. When our motives are in order, the more powerful we become. We should have time for Work, Worship, Play, and Rest. We have to be balanced. What is 30 minutes out of a 24 hour day for prayer, reading, and conversation with God? There are so many distractions. With the Internet, email, Facebook, twitter, etc. turn the phone off and just be for a few hours. If you are constantly grumpy because you aren't resting no one wants to be around you. 

The demands of people is also a distraction! Bein a people pleaser can steal intimacy with God. People want a lot of things from us but the problem is they aren't considering what will be good for us but what will be good for them. People are selfish, not on purpose but they just are. 

Most of the time you can't fulfill the call that God has over your life because of the noise are you. The distractions, lack of focus, lack of discipline, willingness to say no. Sometimes losing a few friends is what you need to do so you can gain REAL friends who will help you and direct you on the right path!

Beautiful

I'm sitting outside with the kids while they swim in the pool. While I was getting them sprayed down with sun screen I was talking with Callie. She was telling me how much she loved to swim and how much she loved water.

Her story is amazing in itself. Someday I might explain why she is such a fighter and her parents faith builds my own daily.   But let me explain her beauty. Not only is she an adorable in ever aspect of the word but she has 2 things about her that stand out to me the most. 

Her voice. She has the most beautiful voice. I've worked with Callie for almost 3 years and heard her before and after her surgery. Before it was hard to hear her and she was very quiet. Now she is full throttle wide open and loud. I even have to tell her to be quiet. Which I love!!!! 

Her trach scar! Seeing her neck without the trach is amazing. Putting her sunscreen on makes me tear up every time. Her strength, ability to adapt, to take people making jokes about her, her determination. 

What I'm getting at is the things that she might see as a negative about herself are the most beautiful. Whatever you see as negative about yourself God sees as beautiful. Those things you are so worried about. Your hair, your acne, your pale completion, how tall you are, how different your body type is, everything. Those things are beautiful to someone. 

Every detail about you was hand painted by God and he loves that about you. If you were a painter and you painted this picture that was BEAUTIFUL to you and someone wanted I change the colors because they didn't like it, how would you feel? So why do we spend so much time and money into changing the details of our body? 

Contemplate that. God took time on you because you are irreplaceable. You are beautiful even when you don't feel like it.

Be who God made you to be. Don't fit "the mold"

Today on my way home I called my mom, as usual. I was talking to her and trying to explain a few things I just didn't understand and things that have been bothering me for a few years now. She reminded me of a story which later triggered a memory in me.

I feel like more and more these days people are pressured to fit this specific mold. May it be as a teacher, a Christian, mother, surgeon, anything. I can grasp being held to a standard. You wouldn't want to go to meet your surgeon and him being hungover from the rad party he crashed the night before. You have a certain level of expectation for that profession. However, people are setting their standards TOO high and not accepting the package deal.

At any rate, my story. When I was about 14 my church at the time was getting ready to gain a new youth pastor. In our church, since it was a paid position, we held interviews with 4 of our most trusted elders and 4 teenagers. Believe me when I say I had never felt so much of an honor than at that moment to be chosen as one of the 4. I remember the adults asking questions then we got to start. I started firing away. I had always been more of the verbal one in the group so I went at them like a hound dog on a cheeseburger.

One of the adults, whom I highly respected, told my mother that he was impressed by my level of boldness and strength in my relationship with Christ. Recently I have forgotten my boldness! A great friend of mine told me that he enjoyed speaking with me because I didn't waver in my convictions. 

Then I was reminder that during youth one night my wonderful youth pastor was explaining about living outside of the box and being content in the person I was. I remember standing outside of a masking tape square and telling myself that I wasn't to conform to the ways of the world.

Living the Christian life has never been easy. I've lost many friends, a best friend if 15 years, and been placed on a target for judgement. People look at you and wait for you to fail so they can point and laugh!!! So as I was having dinner this evening I realized something. im not supposed to conform to this world but the ways that people think I should be living as well!

I am who I am and God made me to be me. I am out of the ordinary, gut busting hilarious, filled with joy, passionate, driven, gifted, and bold. I have forgotten lots of things about myself until an old friend saw me for the first time in 10 years and the first thing that was said was, "are you still singing and acting?" When I said no he was in shock and said, well you should be because you should never hide that gift!!

I guess this is a warning of sorts. I'm gonna start being bold, speaking up, and living the life with the Deborah calling that I was given!! And please be encouraged to remember who YOU are in Christ and rekindle that.

Changing what you don't like about yourself.

Well, there is this beautiful little girl I know who has trouble reading. Her mother and myself have decided that this summer we are gonna teach her to read, along with maintaining their summer reading challenge of 50 books!! As we came to this conclusion I realized how much I despise reading. 

I've always had a hatred for reading unless it was fear street by R.L. Stine. I'm a little to old for that now. However, I know how much it bothers myself that I don't like reading. So, along with little miss, this summer I too shall be doing a reading challenge. 

I took a brave step and decided to go to college and I know that reading is going to be HUGE!! I've made the decision to read, read, read. I don't want the kids to think that hating reading is okay. You gain knowledge and become smarter the more you read. Also learning the characteristics of God trough reading his word. 

I'm going to ambitiously attack 13-15 books with my favorite one having over 1,000 pages!! Last time I read it was High School. 

My point is this, if you don't like something about yourself, change it. Stop saying, oh I wish I was thinner or I wish I wasn't so anti social. DO SOMETHING!!!! Warning, don't change for someone else, do it for yourself. There is no shame in changing for yourself. Not to impress someone, keep someone in your life, but for you!!!! 

You are a beautiful creation that deserves to feel like you are the best you that you can be!! Pick one small thing and try it! Not only am I reading daily but I'm eating better, exercising, doing daily chores, keeping a house clean, maintaining my marriage, working, and enjoying God to the fullest extent. Everyone has the same 24 hours in a day they way you use them is up to you!!!!!

Selfish fleshly vs Sacrificial fulfillment

Recently something has been heavy on my heart. Okay 2 days, but that's enough. Love. True love. I honestly can't stand hearing the phrase, "I'm in love." Mainly because most people don't even understand the fullness of love. 

Love, as we all know it from 1 Corinthians, talks about the characteristics of love. I'm gonna throw a curve ball from something God showed me this evening. Genesis 2 talks about God making a helper for Adam in the garden. I think marriages should be that way for both parties. 

In a relationship there is a lot of give and take. Sometimes more give than take. Let me explain with an example, I was in a relationship with a guy who I wanted to see every weekend. This guy happened to live in Fredericksburg. I would spend every other weekend up there with him, however I had to provide myself with somewhere to stay. I would spend 4+ hours on the road, over 200 in hotel food and gas, and have to have him home by 8, and could never call his house. There were so many limitations and restrictions on our relationship. But I felt it was worth the time. I was in a very fleshly selfish relationship. 

I would give and give and never see anything in return. It's not about having to have something in return, it's about them wanting to do that because of how they feel for you. Selfish people are very inward, controlling, they can call you at the drop of a hat and know that you would answer or be at there house in a instant if they asked. Regardless of what you think or feel where you are, that is NOT love. And it's not Godly.

Sacrificial love is the most amazing thing EVER! It's a partnership of decisions, wanting the other to achieve their goals, wanting them to move forward in there life with Gods will. For God so loved the word that he gave his only son. Sacrifice, that's real love. Changing things about yourself for the other person because something you do bothers them. 

I wish people would learn to walk in Gods anointing for their life and allow him to bring that perfect person into their life. It would cause less heartache and pain. God wants you to be happy and full of life. Succeeding in all the things he has planned. The perfect spouse would enhance your relationship with Christ not hinder it. The perfect boyfriend would push you to run for God as he runs for him too.

Everyone deserves a sacrificial fulfilling love in their life. Everyone should feel like they are filled when they are in a relationship not drained from fighting. Walk in Gods path and not your own fleshly desires. God knows what is best and what is right for you and wants to be able to see you succeed!!! He created someone for YOU to enhance the God size dream you have. 

I DARE you to walk in what you feel you are called to do and see what happens. Who God puts in your path, or who he takes out. The choice is yours and yours alone. But Gods path is MUCH easier traveled if you do it correctly the first time.

Second glance

We were made in His image but we all look different. I thought about reflections yesterday and what it looked like to mirror Christ. I went through examples in the bible of people. Adam and Eve committed the first sin. Noah, despite his huge trust and faithfulness towards God, was a drunkard. On and on the stories go.

I quickly realized that God not only sent Jesus as a sacrifice to the world but he is the best example of what God looks like. Jesus never sinned, he was a perfect spotless lamb. We all carry those characteristics inside of us.

Joyce Meyers once said that we don't have to pray for more patience, joy, or faithfulness. Those things are already planted in us we just have to tap into them more. I totally agree. We are imperfect people living in a world that watches our every move like we are a celebrity! Not because we are famous but because they want to watch us fail.

Now when the bible talks about reflecting Christ. We are supposed to imitate his character. I could sit here and write a huge list about Jesus's character but I won't. The only way we are able to reflect him more is to get to know him.

Example, when you have a best friend you two start acting alike. Most of the time we don't even notice it, but it does happen. That's why the bible warns us about bad company corrupting good character. The only way to fully know and understand Jesus's character is to read about him and talk to him.

To be Christlike we must have a relationship with Christ. Not this Sunday Wednesday crap people do. Going to church and calling yourself a Christian is like getting in the shower and just turning the water on. You have to apply it to your daily life! It's work!!!!! 

So, when you look into the mirror what do you see? 

Shall we only accept good and not trouble?

So, I am getting my oil changed and decided to read my bible for a while. Maybe some Noah to help my awesome wonderful right side of my brain with lessons for the kids, when I come across a mind blower!!!

He replied, "you are talking like a foolish woman. Shall we accept good from God, and not trouble?" Job 2:10 

A lot of people look to God in troubled times and not all the time. Job knew that it was a test and he was willing to take the plunge and trust in God for all things. 

So many times in life we see things starting to go bad and freak out and scream, WHY IS THIS HAPPENIN TO ME GOD?!? When we should possibly change our words to say, God what do I need to be learning from this situation. 

Of course it's not ever easy because sometimes situations are so bad that we can't even begin to see a positive side. We just have to have a little trust (and pixie dust... Ugh stupid disney channel) 

Going back to Job. He knew that through good and bad he would accept it and cling to God. In the end that's all we can do sometimes. 

3 year goal accomplished

I know many people have New Years resolutions they make and usually don't keep them past June. Every year with the church I attend we make a year plan.

I take these sections family, education, physical, spiritual, marriage, and self and make 5 goals for each.

Over the years I have seen goal after goal reached and achieved. Praying for my sister in law, dad, my own stability, and other personal goals being reached. Non as big as this one.

August 2010 Justin and I got married. About 6 months later we found out his credit was crap. Since then Justin and I have been paying little by little to accomplish raising his credit score. Just a few months ago we walked into the house we are now living in. In Gods timing we have found the perfect home.

How much work has been put into this home is insane. Thankfully my brother in laws helped tremendously. And mom for painting. We are sleeping back in our bed, together. (We have been sleeping on couches for about 2 months now) 

God had a perfect plan despite what we thought was a perfect plan. We waited on His timing and everything worked out better than we could have ever imagined!!!

Rock bottom bounce back

This past week I haven't posted a blog because I was faced with a very interesting lesson. This week has been stressful because my husband and I are trying to close on our first home. It's been extremely stressful but worth it in the end.

God has been teaching me so much over this week though. Saturday when Justin and I were getting breakfast I saw an old "friends" vehicle in the parking lot. I have bad blood with this person and didn't want to be confronted so we went through the drivethru and went about our way. Hours later, the vehicle was still there. I wondered to myself if they got a job there. 

This person had made a huge life decision a few months prior to follow their dreams and goals in life. Everything back fired and all was lost. I have felt every emotion with the situation. I was happy for them to follow their dreams however wondered if it was Gods will or their own.

Now they were at a rock bottom. It was heartbreaking. No one who knows God should ever have to hit that place. But after a long week of listening and prayer, I've realized that sometimes we how to hit that hard rocky bottom to be able to climb the ladder back up. No matter where we stand with God sometimes we have to hit that hard place to know what's really gong on.

So in all situations or circumstances. God know what he's doing and you can trust him with you life!!!!!!!!

The black light effect!!!

Recently my boss and myself have been looking at VBS material and God showed me something pretty awesome. The dancers were having moments of going between normal lighting and black lights. I, personally, am a HUGE fan of black lights, neon colors, strobe lights, disco balls and on and on!!!!!

If you've never experiences a black light, I will attempt to explain it. A black light is actually purple florescent bulb and when it is turned on certain colors glow brightly. They are used at clubs sometimes and at cosmic bowling :) It's a surprise what colors pop more than others. It depends on material of a shirt and a color. And EVERYONE has perfect white teeth.

Many many many people have insecurities in the way they look. Most people you wouldn't think that would have it still do. With all the "in your face" media it's difficult not to if you aren't a size 4 or under walking in a 6 inch heel. God always sees us for who we are on the inside. God sees our heart! It's like a black light. You don't know who is gonna glow the brightest until the lights are turned on.

Black light is like God vision!!! He sees our Spirit inside burning and radiating His love! Everyone glows differently in different seasons of their life. It's important that out glow doesn't go away! If we as a human race could grasp that the black light effect is more important than the world vision it would be amazing.

Example of this in action. I used to be able to see a friend of mine before church then after as well. He would notice a change in me. He said it was like I was radiating love and warmth. Being around those who are glowing brightly rub off on us. Spending time with God makes us glow a little brighter.

Think about how much you would want to glow under the black light. God sees it constantly and is always looking at our inside. He loves to see his children's light shine! Although we don't live under a purple sun and can't see what God sees, that doesn't mean we don't know how our Spirit feels. :)

A shoulder to lean on.

When life throws you things over and over and over and over and you don't think you can go on, what happens? Many people have that person who they can lean on and talk to. Granted lots of people hold closer to God in those times but some people need a shoulder to "lean" on.

We need someone to tell us we aren't going insane when we feel like our whole world is crumbling. Some people don't have that support. Some people have people who they think they can trust and they totally back stab them. There are some people who want support and don't have it.

What happens to those people who are desperately seeking a shoulder, support, someone to say its gonna be okay? They can go insane or end up taking their life. I know that we don't wanna think about those things but look at this.

In Kidz Krib we have been learning about friendship and how important it is. God made us for friendship and connection with other people. Friendship is taking the good with the bad and loving someone unconditionally. Think about if your best friend, the person who you told everything, disappeared. How devastated would you be?

I can see how it devastates the kids when someone tells them they aren't friends. It's equally as important to adults. Humans were made for connection and relationship. We need encouragement, assurance, a listener, support to survive. It's very hard to find that person.

Try to find people you can trust to be there through all things, not just the bad. But when things are going well for you as we'll. Friendship is like experimental cooking. Some are amazing, some fail, some are only good for a short season. Then sometimes you find that recipe that is perfect and you couldn't live without it!!!!!!!

Overwhelmed but stable

It's no surprise to Justin or myself that everything is a HUGE cluster of mess with purchasing our home. God seems to do these things so we remember who is in control. Let me give you a hint, it's never us.

When Justin and I started dating it was evident by week 2-3 that we were gonna end up getting married. There was no dramatic proposal, we just started planning the wedding. Despite everyone telling us not to, we had spiritual confirmation. We set up marriage counseling with the church and began planning.

There was an issue, Justin was still legally married. He hadn't set up papers for divorce. That was also something we had to do. The deadline was arriving so quickly that we were actually thinking that we would have to move the wedding. We decided that if all else failed we would explain to everyone what had happened and have a huge party.

Justin and I would go for walks at night and I would cry. It was weeks away from our wedding day and we might not be able to even get married. Justin assured me that God knew what he was doing. He's always had more faith than I. 2-3 weeks before we were to say I do the paperwork went through and we were able to get married.

We are now 2 days past our original closing date for the house and looking at closing, hopefully, by the second week of may. I was hoping God would have blessed Justin with a different position at work so he would be straight day light, but he didn't.

After many stressful experiences, and Justin remaining calm I've learned that it is true that God will never give you more ban you can handle. We were blessed with a washer and dryer, paint, lawn mower, weed eater, and countless other things that were given to us. Justin is getting a house warmer present that he has always wanted and I got one too.

God will never put a situation in front of you that you can't handle, may that be a child who is strong willed, a job that is horrible, a friendship gone wrong, He is in control. God have humans free will however he knew what he was doing. We have to learn to trust Him and His judgement. He can see a bigger picture than we can.

Just trust Him!!!

Marriage, love, commitment.

When you start dating someone and you guys fall head over heals giggly happily in love it's the best feeling ever. Then time passes and there could be an engagement and eventually a marriage. After 3 years of marriage let me be honest. It's hard!

I'm no marriage guru or claim to know everything but I've learned a few things. The longer you are married the more experience and knowledge you have. But let me throw a few things on the table for you.

When you are 'dating' and you are constantly breaking up and getting back together, sometimes it's great practice for divorce. It's just easier to break up because the opposite person doesn't understand and you get frustrated. Bye bye. You work trough things in a marriage. There are days Justin and I are down each others throats!! But we are still married and take our vowels seriously. Ephesians 4:26 says that we aren't supposed to let the sun go down on our anger.

Marriage isn't about you. It's about both of you. You don't get to do what you want when you want anymore. You have to communicate. It's not something that happens overnight. We are just now starting to see how to communicate a little bit. I am not my husband and he is not me. We are different and we have to learn how to talk to each other differently so we understand each other. Saying I don't understand isn't a bad statement. You both probably have different backgrounds. Different upbringings. Etc.

I'm not here downing divorce because my husband has been divorced. My mom has also. I know it breaks Gods heart however I know how much God forgives and loves us. Marriage is difficult. It's unselfish, compromising, hardwork, and glorious. Make sure you really understand what you are walking into.

Marriage is a daily decision to love the other person. Some days are easier than others!!!!!! Every marriage is different from the next. The closer the both of you are to God the closer the two of you are.

Facing Your Biggest Fear

Anyone who knows me knows how much I LOVE kids!!!! Many are surprised I don't have any yet. Recently I have been making jokes about the reasons why I don't have kids.

-I love sleep. Naps aren't an option anymore and boy do I love them!!!!
-You are NEVER alone again. And I'm a very Independant person.
-Vomit and Deborah do NOT go in the same sentence, period.
-Infant poop has got to be the most terrible thing God ever placed on this earth!

The list grows and giggles begin! However, only a group of 3 people know why I haven't taken the plunge into children. So here's the secret, infants terrify me. When I was handed Lyla for the first time at only a few days old, I freaked out. There is no legit reason for my terror and yes it seems silly.

This thrill seeking, adrenaline junky, pyro, snake playing gal who wants to skydive and bungee jump is terrified by a small infant. I'm unaware if its the thought of the responsibility or just knowing how small they are.

Point being this, today I was to be at work at 530 to get some kids. One being an infant. I didn't think I could do it and was freaked out when God showed me something. First of all Gods word tells us that he did not give us the spirit of fear. (2 Timothy 1:7) of course for some people that won't automatically take the fear away for some situations.

Not only do I know that God is with me and wouldn't give me more than I could handle, but someone else showed faith in me that I was capable to do it! In life we have to have those around us building us up, reminding us if what we are capable of doing.

God has great things planned for us! Bigger things than we can even imagine. We cannot allow fear to control our drive for moving forward in life. When the world says no way, we say 'Yahweh'. Know that no matter the mountain you face, may it be a change in job, marriage, moving, school, or even changing a diaper, God is with you. You are worthy of being able to overcoming the obstacles that stand in your way of fulfilling your destiny!!!!!